Over-analysing doesn't solve anything.

It just drives you crazy and makes you jump to, usually wrong, conclusions.

Iv decided to get some help again.
I can't keep going like this anymore.
I just want to be healthy...
Mentally and physically.
Time to change for the better.
Time to change for good.

I drew a picture of Lachlan and myself today.
Just a quick sketch of how we were the other day.
Lachlan was exhausted from work so he slept beside me/on me while I just read my book.
We spent all day like that pretty much.
I'll probably never show anyone the picture but I just felt like sharing :)

Stay and watch the stars come out and then the sun as they all fade awayI'll sing you every songI know if it will make you want to stayAnd then i'll sayThat I missed youAnd these wordsThey'll convince you, to stayI poured through every song I wroteEvery line that I've cried every note that was split with this penAnd every line in every song, they all seemed to come out wrong,Untill your songSo lets sing it all night longWhile the view from every rooftop says to staySo stayStay and watch the stars come out and then the sun as they all fade awayIll sing you every song I know convince you to stay
And I could call you baby doll all the timeAnd youd whisper in my ears youd say i missed you boy Now sing it over again, and over again, and over again,And you could call me baby doll all the time And I'd whisper in your ears, I'd say I missed you boyNow sing it over again and over again, and over again

The first kiss stole the breath from my lips
Our hearts beat inside our chest

Leaving us gasping for every breath
So satisfying and I'm still smiling

Dear Diary...

Yesterday I Ate Soup With A Fork.

Lachlan Laughed At Me.

It Was A Good Day.

Love Kyla-Maree.

Though He Sleeps,
The Inspiration He Gives Me
Never Tires...

I was told I was too young for love

Yet I did dream

you talk a lot of trash

you talk a lot nonsense

you talk a lot of nothing

you talk a lot of secrets

you talk a lot of lies

there's just one thing i'd like to say

screw you and have a nice day

xoxo

This morning, when the moon was falling, 

my love, he rose and began on a tiring journey.

My love, it seems, has started a quest.

To provide a service that none else can do best.

He's gone to hell. 

His hands will burn and his fingers will lightnen.

Covered in a substance so rotten.

He will lift hot heavy metal and create with his bare hands.

All the while I wonder, where is my love's mind?

Where does he go, while he toils and strains?

Does he yearn to come back to me again?

I wait and watch, and wonder when he will return.

I know he will be back, but I cant shake the feeling of loss.

Not until he's in my arms again, will I be able to consider this worth the cost.

He's out there doing his best to survive.

He's out there in the wilderness, amongst all the evil.

I look out the window and yearn to call his name.

So he will know how to get back to me again.

My love, he has gone to hell.

I wait for this return.

Current mood ::

state of well-being characterized by emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy

With you, my days turn to dust and my weeks swept away.

Without you, my days are rock; heavy and a burden.

With you, time ceases to exist.

Without you, time lingers; unwelcome.

With you, I lose all sense of how much time we have spent.

Without you,

I cant control the way I count down til we are together again.

It was so loud, so loud.

The scream held inside of me.

It took control and bound my limbs.

So tight it held.

Made me numb.

Like tiny pin pricks, the feel returned.

My very veins shook in the rush.

I had to close my eyes to hold it all inside.

So loud, so loud, this emotion was.

TOMORROW I START AGAIN! 

there is nothing more beautiful or powerful

than the moment you make that connection:

between your inner self and your outter image.

♥ ♥ ♥

Happy 21st Lachlan!

xoxoxox

People Are Lonely Because They Build Walls Instead Of Bridges

- excuse me - we always had an expiry date - you knew it - I knew it - we are over - move on -

- we've talked this through -

- i wasn't meant for you-

-and you couldn't give me what i need -

- if you miss me then im sorry -

- but you had you're chance and you honestly you blew it -

- find some one else that finds you right for them -

Let Love Clasp Grief Lest Both Be Drowned;

 Let Darkness Keep Her Raven Gloss.

vegetarian one of course ;P

Somethings are better left in black and white... no grey area's. no colour. no mixes to confuse and aid further frustration.

Something are just better left straight forward, said how it is, as it is.

Dont 'beat around the bush' just tell me how you feel, exactly as it comes out of your mouth, or through your written word.

Just be real.

Just be straight.

Just. Be. Honest.

A VERY HAPPY (belated) BIRTHDAY TO A VERY SPECIAL GIRL XX

It pleases me no end to say,
I wish you another great year;

Full of adventure, hope and cheer.

So happy birthday to you ShinnadeFrom the bottom of my heart.xoxox

The Letter - A Knights Tale

-THE MIDDLE AGES - THE SIXTEENTH CENTURY - THE EARLY SEVENTEENTH CENTURY - THE RESTORATION AND THE EIGHTEENTH CENTURY - THE ROMANTIC PERIOD - THE VICTORIAN AGE -

For they are the men and women that are set in stone through pages made of dead trees

They shaped their minds through words that clash  but in their ways make sense

Every line they scribe and recite hits our hearts and we take them as we desire

The type of music I study too::

'Granite' - Pendulum

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j6JhI4fVxPQ&feature=related

You can hide your eyes, you can dim the lights, but they are watching!
This is a new time, with a different kind, they are the future
The only one!

This is the final call for the setting song as they get closer.
And with full blown grace, thy will be done the show is over.
Its a new dawn!

Just leave this place behind,
Ill grill your place, don’t mind.
And you’re the only one, ‘cos you’re up on defense.
This is a new way!

We are standing by, no time to hide, no meeting half way.
You were sucking life through the needles eye, this is a new day.
They have won!

We would have reckon now, what we have done, left in the open.
The cool we know will rise under, they are the future.
Future!

When all your fears combined, the Memphis was refined.

 And I know you tried to understand.
This is a new age!

with wishes

thinking, "here today" or "here tomorrow will he come"

and thinking, "this will please him best"

for he will see them on tonight

and with that thought her colour burns;

and, even when she turned, the curse had fallen

was drowned in passing

he is not here; but far away

still she, with wishes, waits for him again

mornings pass and nights fall

in her dreams he calls

my love my love

for what

she

is

LT3

and you creep back into my mind, ruin everything when its fine.
i dont miss you anymore, i have a love, a someone that is so much more.

leave me behind, move on into the life you created.

stop crawling into my mind frame, stop rolling in on a whim.

and you creep back into my mind, things without you are just fine.

Darling you pulled me from the wreckage

My self destructive vice

Love, you turned my world inside out

I spend the hours apart from you,

wondering what it is you do

To me - To me

Darling, what is this you do to me

I shake in my own thoughts

I used to think I was right

Now, love, all I know that is true

That darling, I'm so lucky to have you

Through all my terrible days

You bring my head to peace

Through the times I find it hard to believe

Its only you that can make my heart see

That my lover, I'm no longer alone

You make me feel whole.

I close my eyes to dream a dream a never ending dream where dreams never end and are a reality spent awake in the never ending dream where dreams are constant and ever changing in the place where dreams are a never ending reality and reality is a long forgotten dream in the dream I close my eyes to dream.

“Bear in mind, people with eating disorders tend to be both competitive and intelligent. We are incredibly perfectionistic. We often excel in school,athletics,artistic pursuits. We also tend to quit without warning. Refuse to go to school,drop out,quit jobs,leave lovers,move,lose all our money. We get sick of being impressive. Rather,we tire of having to seem impressive. As a rule,most of us never really believed we were any good in the first place.”

— Marya Hornbacker, Wasted

I want your hands on me.

Her words are like razors, her teeth need not be sharpened.
Still they are pointed, so she can follow through.
Her bite need not be lethal for her voice is tainted with poision.
A single sting, a single prick will leave you quite immobilised.
She is not a hungry being, for food she does not hunger.
Perfect is what her appetite craves.
Perfection is the name of her game.
Who is she?
She is a mystery.
So what we will call her,
Is ..

I F E L L A P A R T B U T G O T B A C K U P A G A I N

Having a rather unattractive day... Bleh!

so now i fall into sleep without you.

its lonely for a moment.

maybe even for a while.

but there you always are in the end.

ill meet you in the dream world.

Reminds me of Lachlan XD

I always wonder what your up too... you naughty cowboy, you

-we all change-

-for better-

-for worse-

-we all change-

HI NICE TO MEET YOU, IM FATTY MCFAT-FAT

30 Day Song Challenge - A Song You Know All The Words To

If questioning would make us wise, No eyes would ever gaze in eyes; If all our tale were told in speech, No mouths would wander each to each. Were spirits free from mortal mesh, And love not bound in hearts of flesh, No aching breasts would yearn to meet And find their ecstasy complete. For who is there that lives and knows The secret powers by which he grows? Were knowledge all, what were our need To thrill and faint and sweetly bleed? Then seek not, sweet, the "If" and "Why", I love you now until I die. For I must love because I live And life in me is what you give.

They've said you're not so pretty,

not really even attractive,

that compared me to your nothing.

Id love to believe them.

 I really do.

But the truth is,

 I feel like nothing compared to you.

I really don't know why.

Guess I'll never know.

Because I'm going to stop,

As of

right

now.



There is nothing sweeter, nothing as lovely, nothing as wonderful.
There is nothing that compares to you.
There is nothing as sexy, nothing I lust after, nothing I want more.
There is nothing that compares to you.

“In life we do things. Some of them we wish we had never done, others we wish we could replay in our heads a million times. But in the end, it’s those experiences which shape every detail about us; if we were to reverse any of them, we would not be at the exact place or the exact person we are today. So just LIVE. Make mistakes, but learn from them. Have wonderful times, but never second guess who you are, where you have been, and most importantly, where it is that you are going. Just have faith that life is happening as it should.”

I DIDNT WANT TO LEAVE

Hey, remember the other day, when we sat on your couch and played? Thats all I wanna do right now...just be with you really.

You always looked perfect - So What - I Cared - Now Im Down With Who I Am

30 Day Song Challenge - Day 04

A Song That Makes You Sad

Tonight - FM Static

Secrets lose their power when told...

You read the cautious and shy words I sent to you as an attack.

Context is everything and obviously you took mine the wrong way.

Yeah, it does feel terrible to be rejected by someone you love doesn't it...

I wonder if you realise just how much I actually miss you.

I've been going over and over everything in my head.

I should have offered you more, I know.

But what I did you just seemed to ignore.

Im tired.

I just wish I knew why you dislike me so much...

I just... really dont care anymore.

current mood:

I wish I was a blank canvas.

I wish that when I take off my makeup before bed tonight,

that I was wiping away all I am.
I wish I could wake up tomorrow morning and be brand new.

Pensant à vous

thinking of you lachlan

I want something permanent. Something...that can't be taken away.

Is that too much to ask?

Such a pretty littlearent you?

Made a mistake, I made a mistake

I wear the scars to show my shame

Made a mistake, I made a mistake

I wear the scars to show my shame

What should I do, what should I do

When I'm the one who can't get through?

What should I do, what should I do

When I'm the one, hey, I'm the one to blame?

Photographer: Terry Sinclair Model: Krystle Marie (C) 2008

30 DAY SONG CHALLENGE - DAY THREE

A Song That Makes You Happy

Maria Mena - You're The Only One

You think you're rather clever,

you think your really smart,

I'll give you this much,

you've got hypocrisy down to an art.

You Give Me Pterodactyls - That Take Me Further Then I've Ever Been

Then the ground ate my leg
So I looked up the sky and said,

"I don't want to go back down!"